Hello!

I know it is fairly early for me to even be considering any RP critiquing, but I would like to know if I am on the right track. Fairly self-conscious of my style of writing, I know I have a lot to develop and learn from this type of real time feel, but I would like to know if I am heading in the right direction. A few questions I had are below:

How is my third person present-tense?

Is May a character you would be interested in having a scene with?

What do you notice already that I may need to work on before it hinders me in the future?

Is there too much meta?

Do I describe my scenes in a good way? How are my descriptive words (I’m awful at describing things)?

Am I heading in the right direction so far?

I tried something new in the recently log with Harrison/May in an attempt to show her dislike for guns because of the way her father died (and the complete irony her mutation could gift her if she were to wield a weapon), but I don’t know if I got the idea across. Afterwards, I almost felt as if Harrison pushed me to want May to be mean/compete with his grumpy personality. And then I completely backed out of it by apologizing in the end. That’s not good right?

Like I said, I am fairly new so I wouldn’t have too many logs with anyone to get a stable understanding of the character just yet, but I would like some RP assistance, if you will. I would really like to have a smooth writing style like Kelsey/Percy, Harrison/Isabel, or Emma/Jean/Kelsey interactions.

Live journal: http://xmm-may.livejournal.com/

I think it's really early for me to consider offering you critique. Two scenes is such a small number! I can offer the general advice from my personal experience: when I really like how someone RPs, I try to narrow down exactly what aspects of their RP I enjoy and try to incorporate them into my own RP. It sounds like some of your concerns are natural character-settling concerns. (Was this reaction weird, was this interaction okay.) I know that, when I have a new character, a large amount of personality gets solidified in my first couple weeks of play.

How I approach RP is a lot how I approach acting, and I think that RP is a lot similar to acting than it is to writing prose. (This might also just be because I'm an actor, so this is my point of reference.) The more I worry about how my poses are coming across, the more self-conscious I get, which is no fun. My best RP happens when I focus on reaction. (Which is, incidentally, one of the most important aspects of acting. POINT OF REFERENCE, OKAY?) Reading carefully what the other person has written, focusing on the genuine reaction of my own character to it. My worst and most frustrating RP happens when I let myself stop focusing on that and focus on what I'd like to be happening in the scene. It is such a horrible trap that I've fallen in and all it brings for me is frustration. So that's the point where I have to take a breath, step back in my head, and really try to look at what's actually going on. What is actually being said to my character, what is the other character actually doing.

So. Those are aspects of RP that I try to keep in mind and that I struggle with personally. I feel comfortable offering that much, at least.

There is an awesome thread on meta in XMM and it might be a fun read for you, since you mentioned meta in one of your questions: viewtopic.php?f=6&t=44

I hope this was in any way helpful!

I think the best piece of advice you can be offered right now is not to worry so much. Your prose is solid, your spelling and grammar are solid, and from what little contact I've had with you on channel, you seem fun. Everything else will come with time, as you settle into both your character and the game environment.

The only other suggestion I have is not to let other characters (or players!) determine how you play your own character. We do have a few dominant personalities on the game, and while it's easy enough to fall into a pattern of ducklinging along, it's a lot less satisfying than finding the natural reactions your character would be having to a scene. I promise no one will be offended if you have May reacting in a way that runs counter to their own IC actions - especially those of us who play grumpy characters.

(And, for the record, I would indeed be interested in scening with you, on either of my alts.)

Just a third to the general trend here, which is to say that the biggest point of focus at this point is getting to know May and who you want her to be. I think it can sometimes be a little daunting for new people to dive into some stuff on XMM because we are not at all shy of interpersonal conflict - sometimes very nasty interpersonal conflict - between characters. While maintaining quite pleasant relationships OOC!

So don't feel bad if you end up in a scene with someone who's grouchy, or an asshole, and you want May to react like they are being grouchy, or an asshole. Don't feel like you need to adapt harder or grouchier or even sit back and take it. So long as the reaction feels true to who you're making May to be, you will be peachy.